How to Tolerate Art Styles You Secretly Despise

How to Tolerate Art Styles You Secretly Despise

Aiden Fishbein

Let's face it, not all art is created equal. Sometimes you walk into a gallery and see a painting that looks like a toddler got into the finger paints, or a sculpture that resembles a pile of garbage. And yet, art snobs will tell you that you have to appreciate every style, no matter how hideous it may be. Well, fear not my fellow art haters, because there is a philosophy that can help you tolerate even the ugliest of art styles. It's called tolerance, and it's a magical little tool that can make you look like a cultured art lover without having to actually enjoy the art.

Sleep Aid

Sleep Aid

Aiden Fishbein
Lessons, Vignettes

The phone alarm blasted into my brain like a jackhammer-tipped freight train. Out of context the chime could be described as sweet, even soothing, but the tone had been corrupted and now elicited only fury. I swung my legs out from under the cozy covers and fumbled my toes around to find my slippers. On they went. My first moment of triumph in the last four hours. It was eight o’ clock, I had been awake since four, and this was not normal.

My Dress Is Too Short?

My Dress Is Too Short?

Vaña Blaque
Vignettes

Years ago in the 90s I worked at a hell hole of a call center. It was my first "office" job and I tried really hard to be professional. What I didn't know was that a call center is basically the same as a restaurant. Everyone was sleeping with each other, on drugs/alcohol, and the managers were idiots.

Wet Green Glory – A Daydream

Wet Green Glory – A Daydream

Aiden Fishbein
Vignettes, Lessons, Tangents

The hill sloped steeply down from the mountain. Sharp black crags faded to green as the meadow ate its way up the foothills. The story is the same as far as the eye can see – emerald valley marching into the blue-grey haze of atmosphere with its river spine snaking chasing the horizon.

This is Ireland, he says quietly to no one. This was a good idea.

Downtown Saturday Nights

Downtown Saturday Nights

Aiden Fishbein
Vignettes

Oh lord, I’m sooo tired! How looong can this go ooon?

My Dad’s baritone reverberated through the concrete corridor of the 4th Avenue underpass like Zeus cursing Greek mortals. And then the chorus:

Workin' in a coal mine
Goin' down, down, down
Workin' in a coal mine
Oops, about to slip down

Wanted: Blood, Sweat, and Tears

Wanted: Blood, Sweat, and Tears

Aiden Fishbein
Lessons, Vignettes

There’s just something about working with your hands.

Especially when you’ve been too long working with your fingers.

When day in day out you’ve been tip tapping away on screens and keyboards, it is a soulfully welcome departure to do a bit of carpentry or construction (or destruction for that matter).

Hammers and saws and sanders and stain. I’ll be damned if I ever go desking again.

Conversations with a Mystery Musician

Conversations with a Mystery Musician

Aiden Fishbein
Vignettes, Lessons

I met (name) yesterday.

Fluting around on the NW side.

He passed by and I said “Hey, that’s beautiful.”

He said “Thanks.”

It was only after he walked around the corner at the end of the block that I’d remembered a little snippet from Rick Rubin’s interview on the Broken Record Podcast: “Yea, I’ve just been really wanting to soothe people with my instrumental music, so these days I often go to the park and flute around.”

Goodness, that was (name) that just walked by…

Man Versus Machine

Man Versus Machine

Aiden Fishbein
Tangents, Vignettes

I hacked the sucker.

I broke him wide open.

Put the screws to the mammajamma.

Or rather, removed the screws from the mammajamma, did some wigglin’ and a snippin’ and then screwed the screws back in the sucker.

Apologies for the abstraction. I am illustrating my morning battle with my Keurig coffee maker, and the resultant hack I was forced (nay, willingly embarked upon) to correct its character and insubordinate behavior.

But first, why was I battling with the caffeine machine?

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